Coming and Going on Easy Terms

What do you think of when you imagine Italy? I think of pizza and pasta, but my opinion is slightly screwed by 21 years of endless eating.

Setting the scene:
I traveled with 8 girls and my self, pretty standard. The trip started at 4:30 am Sunday morning when the cab arrived at 49 Gower. I had laid my head at 3am. Little did we know that the hour trip to the airport would be the cheapest taxi excursion we would take in the next week £45 x2. If you really want a thrill, call Marlybone Minicabs, they'll take you to Gatwick airport at 120MPH, no questions asked.
Venice was the first stop. This is when it started, we needed a cab. When Italian cab drivers see American tourists, they all piss themselves with excitement. We paid the same amount as our morning trip to get 1/4 of the distance, with negotiation. They don't use meters when you can't speak Italian, it's whatever price they want...
The Hotel Villa Dori was by far the best €15 a night hotel I have ever inhabited. Title floors, decorated walls, bath towel warmers and a high quality beday, which is of course a necessity.
The public transportation in Venice turns out to be free, if you want it to be. We took the bus to the city where we immediately consumed gelato served by an Asian woman. Which was the trademark of our two days in Venice. The group found what looked like a little Italian restaurant which would be owned by...Italians. An Asian served me pizza. I bought my first bottle of Italian wine from an Asian. I don't know.
Venice had the greatest postcards in print. A lucky few of you will receive them in a couple of days.
Venice was relaxing. We took off for Florence around 4pm.

There is a lot to say about Florence. First of all, If you visit don't stay near the train station. Our reservation was for the Hotel Etrussca. The Etrussca lobby was located on the 7th floor of some sketchy building it was very comforting as you can imagine. I showed the desk clerk my reservation to which he replied with a lot of sighs, I didn't quite understand. He didn't either. Apparently we had to go to the sister hotel. Not a problem. Once we arrived at the Hotel Venetto, we were then moved to yet another location, an unmarked building. Our rooms were on the 5 floor. My bed had to be brought in from down the street. Well, this situation didn't get much better, I won't dwell.
The bathrooms in Florence are top quality. You can shower, shave, and well shit simultaneously, no hyperbole. When I say that a beday is a necessity, I mean it. In America we can give up the beday for an enclosed shower. The Italians don't see it they way we do.
We did finally have an Italian meal served by a real Italian. Good food. A lot of Gelato. We walked a lot in Florence. I remember that the most. Michelangelo's David was pretty stunning. You know, I don't want this to get boring. We walked, we ate a lot. That's what you do in Italy, eat.
The first evening we visited the club YAB an €11 cover got you a free drink. I guess that's not too bad. The club was ghetto as fuck. I didn't see many Italians, just ghetto ass Americans.

We traveled to the Chianti wine region on Wednesday. Chianti is what you may imagine Italy to look like. Mountains, vinyards, olive trees, etc. Beautiful place.

A lot happened, I'm skipping it.

Train left for Rome at 6:40am. McDonald's for breakfast.
Apparently everything in Rome closes at 4, so keep that in mind. Gypsies are everywhere. I'll try to be nice and just say that I'm not very fond of the gypsy population. Rome is dirty and you feel as if you're in a third world country some of the time. We did have some good pizza. Our hostel was clean, except for the bedbug scare...I think they were there. I have four bites. May have been a spider, but I'm siding with the bedbug theory.

Now, leaving Rome was about as interesting as entering Florence. The group had dwendled down to 5. Kourtney, Ev, Margaret, Alley, and myself planned to save some time and money and sleep in the Rome Ciampino airport. Bad call. After an 11 Euro pork chop, it was time to find a hotel.

--------------------------It's a different day now-------------------------------

So we got screwed by another cabbie. This is when I begin to dislike Italians quite a lot actually. After a week of trashy hostels, we splurged. We stayed in a very nice hotel for about 5 hours. Airport, got screwed yet again, plane home.
Have you ever flown with RyanAir? It's an experience. The seating is a free-for-all, therefore everyone decided there was need to run down the runway onto the plane. My carry-on box full of Chianti wine was not ready for the jolt of force, the bottom gave out. I'm lucky only one bottle busted. However, the Italian runway guy didn't take it too lightly, I think I delayed the plane. Whatever brotha, get a fucking broom.

That's it, I'm dragging on here.

It took incredibly too long, I didn't proof this, I'm sure it makes no sense

Cheers.